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20 March, 2010

Reset Button

Do you ever wish your life had a reset button? Like when an electronic device goes wonky you hit the reset button and "poof" all the problems that caused it to malfunction magically go away. Well I've decided today I'm hitting the reset button on my life.
Did you hear it?
I've had two decisions I've been agonizing over for several weeks now. One is whether or not I'm going to be teaching this fall. The other is whether or not I'm going to stay in Tampa. I really hate making decision. But I've come to realize the beauty is in the fact that I have so many choices. The world is wide open to me.

This morning I awoke at 5:25am. Yuck!! It's bad enough to have to wake up that early on a school day, but on a Saturday. That's a full two hours earlier than my alarm was set.

Why did I wake up? Stress and anxiety over what to do with my life, dreams and desires I have and will they ever be fulfilled? So I did the most logical thing. I reached across to my bedside console and grabbed my bible and journal.
I flipped to Matthew 6:25-33. The cure for anxiety and worry section, where Jesus reminds us not to worry about what we will eat, what we will wear, the birds of the air and the grass in the field; and ends with seeking God first. It's a good read if you haven't had a chance to do so. Here's a link http://www.biblegateway.com/ . Try the New International Version in the drop down box. King James should not be your first intro into reading a bible.
Sorry, got diverted.

Oh, yeah. Reset button.
So as I'm reading Jesus's words in red, in the back of my mind that "FAITH" word keeps popping back up.
If you think about it does a bird worry that it won't find enough sticks to make a nest, or enough food to eat? Or does it trust that it will be there? Guess what it gets a home and enough to eat.
Being an outdoors kind of girl I've observed this first hand.

So as it says in Matthew 6: If God does this for them why would he not do for me? A Pastor that I work with reminded me the other day. "You have to trust that He (God) is always there for us. Think about how many times He has provided for you."
Then I got this big grin on my face. I remember when I was only able to work part time and I didn't have enough to pay the electric and buy groceries. An anonymous money order showed up in my mail box. No return address or anything. It was enough to buy groceries, and pay the electric with a little left over.
Or the year I only made $7,000.00 but I was able to pay rent and a car payment as well as household needs.
Yeah My God does supply.

So what does that have to do with my reset button you ask?
I hit the reset button because it's time. I've made my faith decision.

Tune in tomorrow for the rest of the story. I've got four hours of writing, hiking, and a film festival on my agenda today.

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