Gary Chapman has a book called "The 5 love languages". You can find out your love language and figure out your spouse's (or future spouse's), or children's. My daughter's is quality time. Hence the lateness of my blog tonight. We just spent the past hour at the dining room table cutting out laminated work for my classroom, and talking. I got to hear her heart. I really needed to hear her and she listened to me. She asked me about some painful experiences of my past and I shared them with her. I also encouraged her to continue to seek Jesus and reminded her of how much He loves her. I enjoy what I'm starting to call our table conversations. Just sitting at the dining room table after dinner or just to hang out, and hear from my blossoming, maturing teen. Neither I or my daughter like the assault approach. The "tell me what's going on and do it now!" tactic. We prefer to ease into it. My love language is two-fold and I have learned to adjust myself to meet my daughter's love language.
Try it with someone close to you. Try and figure out their love language. If you get stumped, just ask them if they've taken the test by Gary Chapman and what the result was. If not, it's a great opportunity for you to find out your love language and theirs as well.
Oh, what are my love languages? Acts of service and quality time. I'd much rather be surprised by having my car detailed and the oil changed (act of service), than a diamond tennis bracelet. A night at the opera, or a spontaneous cruise(quality time), than a bouquet of flowers.
We're each created differently. It helps to know how to show love.