My YA (young adult), novel has a new beginning. It's much more exciting and alive.
My life has a new beginning. I spent two hours yesterday sitting at a covered picnic table at the park with only one other: God. It was hot and I had a couple of sugar ants run up my leg but I had determined in my mind I would not leave, and I'm glad I didn't.
I watched a bright deep red robin, perch on the mirror of my car. I rescued a caterpillar from an army of ants that were trying to carry it off (it wasn't dead). I looked at all the colors and shapes around me and I heard not an outward sound.
Two hours for me to be still and know my God.
Two hours for God to pour His love for me into me. Like Psalm 23 says "my cup runs over..."
Two hours for my Savior Jesus to remind me I am a new creation and the old has passed away so let it.
Leaving work Friday I knew I had to make some changes. My spirit was not at peace. It is now. From situation focused to God focused.
My main character finds her life forever changed by one event.
My life is forever changed by one event-Salvation. Let that sweetness wash over me.
I look at the freedom and abundance Christ offers, and then I look at what the world offers and there is no comparison. A drop of what Jesus offers out weighs a ton of what the world has, and He offers more than a drop.
I am excited to see what choices my main character makes.
I think about the rainbow I drove through, and I am excited to see God's promises to me fulfilled.
Habb 3:2-the vision is yet for the appointed time... The time is now.
12 June, 2010
09 June, 2010
It's Time
I started reading Mark yesterday. In the first few chapters, I have been struck by how the disciples immediately followed Jesus when he called them. They didn’t say “let me get this fish harvest in”, or “I can’t right now. I have a deadline”, or” I will when I’m done.” They immediately followed him. Even Matthew left his tax collecting table and followed Jesus. He didn’t say “let me finish out this year.” He got up and followed Jesus.
God brings a lot of things to mind that reflect back on my writing, on purpose.
The school year is officially over on June 14th. I start back to work early on August 9th. Less than two months to regroup.
I think about the sacrificing the disciples did to follow what Jesus commanded. And I wonder… what am I sacrificing for my writing?
My best writing is done when I am in the zone. It takes at least 30 minutes of writing for me to get in the zone. Once there, I can crank out 3-4 hours writing without even realizing that much time has passed.
My summer starts on June 14th around 2:30ish. My desire is to do a spiritual/writing retreat.
Being a list person I listed out what I need for my retreat.
Bible and Journal
Electricity for my laptop (unless I write it all long hand).
Quiet/Solitude.
Far away from home (so I can’t just pop in).
So I have my list and my direction and what did I do with it yesterday? Nothing.
I prayed this morning that God would help me let go of whatever is keeping me from being 100% obedient to what He is asking me to do. After saying my prayer I opened two daily devotionals on my computer. The first had to do with Psalm 23. Sunday evening my church held communion service based on Psalm 23. I recognized God as Jehovah Rohi (The Lord is my Shepherd). It reminded me what Jesus said in John 10 about Him being the good shepherd. We (sheep) follow Him. I want to follow Jesus no matter where it leads. But somehow I wandered off from my Shepherd. I guess I thought I saw some grass that looked better. But it turned out to be just weeds in disguise.
The second devotional had to do with Matthew 8:18-22. As I read it I was floored. My mouth literally hung open. The scribe wanted to follow Jesus but said “first let me go…” The scribe wanted to do what he needed to do before following Jesus.
A scribe is a writer. So here is a writer choosing his own path first, and then he wanted to do what Jesus wanted. Ouch! I’m a writer that has put everything before her writing. Writing that Jesus has placed in her heart to do.
My prayer was that I would let go of everything that is keeping me from 100% obedience. So I’ll be doing that spiritual/writing retreat starting this weekend; using the time to work on my connection to God and jump starting my writing.
Just like Matthew left his tax collection table and immediately followed Jesus. I’ll be finishing the school year by packing up my personal belongings, turning on my laptop and writing. In obedience His will is revealed.
Have faith in God.
God brings a lot of things to mind that reflect back on my writing, on purpose.
The school year is officially over on June 14th. I start back to work early on August 9th. Less than two months to regroup.
I think about the sacrificing the disciples did to follow what Jesus commanded. And I wonder… what am I sacrificing for my writing?
My best writing is done when I am in the zone. It takes at least 30 minutes of writing for me to get in the zone. Once there, I can crank out 3-4 hours writing without even realizing that much time has passed.
My summer starts on June 14th around 2:30ish. My desire is to do a spiritual/writing retreat.
Being a list person I listed out what I need for my retreat.
Bible and Journal
Electricity for my laptop (unless I write it all long hand).
Quiet/Solitude.
Far away from home (so I can’t just pop in).
So I have my list and my direction and what did I do with it yesterday? Nothing.
I prayed this morning that God would help me let go of whatever is keeping me from being 100% obedient to what He is asking me to do. After saying my prayer I opened two daily devotionals on my computer. The first had to do with Psalm 23. Sunday evening my church held communion service based on Psalm 23. I recognized God as Jehovah Rohi (The Lord is my Shepherd). It reminded me what Jesus said in John 10 about Him being the good shepherd. We (sheep) follow Him. I want to follow Jesus no matter where it leads. But somehow I wandered off from my Shepherd. I guess I thought I saw some grass that looked better. But it turned out to be just weeds in disguise.
The second devotional had to do with Matthew 8:18-22. As I read it I was floored. My mouth literally hung open. The scribe wanted to follow Jesus but said “first let me go…” The scribe wanted to do what he needed to do before following Jesus.
A scribe is a writer. So here is a writer choosing his own path first, and then he wanted to do what Jesus wanted. Ouch! I’m a writer that has put everything before her writing. Writing that Jesus has placed in her heart to do.
My prayer was that I would let go of everything that is keeping me from 100% obedience. So I’ll be doing that spiritual/writing retreat starting this weekend; using the time to work on my connection to God and jump starting my writing.
Just like Matthew left his tax collection table and immediately followed Jesus. I’ll be finishing the school year by packing up my personal belongings, turning on my laptop and writing. In obedience His will is revealed.
Have faith in God.
08 June, 2010
Pour into Me
I have a dear friend that is down right now. She is a huge spiritual encourager. She prays for anyone in need. She is the poster child for praying without ceasing.
Well right now, her cup is empty. Seems no one has been pouring hope, love, or encouragement into her cup (myself included). We are so willing to let others minister to us. Do we stop and think about ministering to them?
I had someone make a comment about how our bible study teacher has no problems. He pours himself via the word of God into many lives. He gets down and discouraged just like many of us. Who pours into him?
So my goal for the remainder of June is to find someone who needs pouring into, and pour some of me into them. Whether it's prayer, sharing a bible verse, a dinner, whatever the Holy Spirit leads me to do.
And maybe it will become a part of my life to do on a regular basis.
So let's do some pouring.
Well right now, her cup is empty. Seems no one has been pouring hope, love, or encouragement into her cup (myself included). We are so willing to let others minister to us. Do we stop and think about ministering to them?
I had someone make a comment about how our bible study teacher has no problems. He pours himself via the word of God into many lives. He gets down and discouraged just like many of us. Who pours into him?
So my goal for the remainder of June is to find someone who needs pouring into, and pour some of me into them. Whether it's prayer, sharing a bible verse, a dinner, whatever the Holy Spirit leads me to do.
And maybe it will become a part of my life to do on a regular basis.
So let's do some pouring.
07 June, 2010
Rewrite
Saturday morning I woke up, dreading going to Panera to work on my YA novel. But I love to write and I especially like the wild blueberry scones at Panera so what was the problem.
I had gotten stuck in the mud with my novel. My characters had been languishing around the kitchen table for months while I worked on other projects, simply because I didn’t know what was supposed to happen next. I also knew in the back of my mind I was looking at a huge rewrite. I had already written 16,000+ words and did not want to have to go back to page one.
Seat of my pants writing is fine for a short article, or a short story, but for a novel. No. I needed some structure. So I got a book on how to write a novel and did a lot of praying about how God wanted me to write it.
I didn’t take everything the novel writing book said, because I knew for me it would be too restrictive. I did take away a way to flesh out my characters and outline my novel. So I spent about 30 minutes with God. I got out of bed, left the laptop at home, grabbed my writing binder (loose leaf paper), and the novel writing book and headed out the door to Panera.
I brought along my rainbow gel pens. I have gel pens in many colors, it helps my creativity. Also the loose leaf paper is to free myself to make a mistake, tear it out, and start again.
I had started writing profiles of each main character in the book at home for about a week, but I changed some things about their appearance, about their morals, about their goals.
I started with a goal for my main character, I gave her a huge conflict that escalates at the beginning to impossibility that she doesn’t even see coming.
Once I had that I started with Roman numeral 1 and kept going.
It took me an hour, but my entire novel is outlined from beginning to end. Along the way I had to remind myself mentally, “If I don’t like it it’s okay; it’s just a road map to keep me focused. I can redo the outline at any point.”
When I finished I said “Thank you Jesus!” I looked at the 4(front side only) pages of outline I had written in blue, green, purple, and orange. I re-read it twice to be sure. I grinned from ear to ear. “Here” I said to myself, “is her story.”
Did I end up changing a lot of it? Yes. Is it for the better? Yes.
Today I will focus on the first five pages. Rewriting them to match what I’ve outlined. So long boring beginning. My character has life!
Rewrite your life.
I myself have gone through a life-altering experience. Rededicating myself to Jesus. Yes, it has caused a major rewrite of my life, my habits, my beliefs, my actions. Did it take time? Yep, about three years and counting. When I sit back and look at the changes in me, like I did when I outlined my novel, am I excited by what I see? Absolutely Yes!!
Jesus gives us second, third, fourth, and so on, chances to change our lives to reflect Him. It takes allowing the Master in to do His work. Aren’t you tired of living a dull, boring, stuck in the mud existence? Do you ever wonder what if? What if I said 100% yes to Jesus and let Him do His will in my life; let Him change me?
My character will have a better life in the book; I have a better life in Christ all because we were rewritten.
I had gotten stuck in the mud with my novel. My characters had been languishing around the kitchen table for months while I worked on other projects, simply because I didn’t know what was supposed to happen next. I also knew in the back of my mind I was looking at a huge rewrite. I had already written 16,000+ words and did not want to have to go back to page one.
Seat of my pants writing is fine for a short article, or a short story, but for a novel. No. I needed some structure. So I got a book on how to write a novel and did a lot of praying about how God wanted me to write it.
I didn’t take everything the novel writing book said, because I knew for me it would be too restrictive. I did take away a way to flesh out my characters and outline my novel. So I spent about 30 minutes with God. I got out of bed, left the laptop at home, grabbed my writing binder (loose leaf paper), and the novel writing book and headed out the door to Panera.
I brought along my rainbow gel pens. I have gel pens in many colors, it helps my creativity. Also the loose leaf paper is to free myself to make a mistake, tear it out, and start again.
I had started writing profiles of each main character in the book at home for about a week, but I changed some things about their appearance, about their morals, about their goals.
I started with a goal for my main character, I gave her a huge conflict that escalates at the beginning to impossibility that she doesn’t even see coming.
Once I had that I started with Roman numeral 1 and kept going.
It took me an hour, but my entire novel is outlined from beginning to end. Along the way I had to remind myself mentally, “If I don’t like it it’s okay; it’s just a road map to keep me focused. I can redo the outline at any point.”
When I finished I said “Thank you Jesus!” I looked at the 4(front side only) pages of outline I had written in blue, green, purple, and orange. I re-read it twice to be sure. I grinned from ear to ear. “Here” I said to myself, “is her story.”
Did I end up changing a lot of it? Yes. Is it for the better? Yes.
Today I will focus on the first five pages. Rewriting them to match what I’ve outlined. So long boring beginning. My character has life!
Rewrite your life.
I myself have gone through a life-altering experience. Rededicating myself to Jesus. Yes, it has caused a major rewrite of my life, my habits, my beliefs, my actions. Did it take time? Yep, about three years and counting. When I sit back and look at the changes in me, like I did when I outlined my novel, am I excited by what I see? Absolutely Yes!!
Jesus gives us second, third, fourth, and so on, chances to change our lives to reflect Him. It takes allowing the Master in to do His work. Aren’t you tired of living a dull, boring, stuck in the mud existence? Do you ever wonder what if? What if I said 100% yes to Jesus and let Him do His will in my life; let Him change me?
My character will have a better life in the book; I have a better life in Christ all because we were rewritten.
31 May, 2010
Rainbow
I drove through a rainbow on the way home from a prememorial day get together with friends.
As the celebration wound down, we watched some videos of Casting Crowns, and The Newsboys. The lead singer of the Newsboys had an amazing testimony about his life and walking away from God; having Satan fill his head with doubt and lies, and the power of Jesus that brought him back around. He now uses the talents God created him with to reach others through his music. That is his form of spiritual worship.
I started thinking about my turn around and return to the Lord. My spiritual worship, my living sacrifice. Am I doing it, or am I still listening to lies?
I have to admit, I get discouraged from working 8 hours a day, in a spiritually void place. I realized I was letting Satan plant weeds around the truth about the plans God has for me.
I confessed them immediately to God; and realized the truth of God will happen. Let that joy fill my heart to overflow.
On the drive home, I was reflecting on my choice to let my belief in God's promises radiate out from me, letting that joy continue to shine on my face, when I saw it--the rainbow: God's promise in Genesis 9:12-14.
The rainbow is a symbol of God's covenant, His promise.
Now I don't know If you've ever driven through a rainbow, but I have to tell you, it was an Awesome experience.
To reflect on God's promises, to purpose in my heart to believe them, and just at that moment to come around the corner, no other car nearby, to see that rainbow and realize I could drive through it, and did it...definately a God moment.
As the celebration wound down, we watched some videos of Casting Crowns, and The Newsboys. The lead singer of the Newsboys had an amazing testimony about his life and walking away from God; having Satan fill his head with doubt and lies, and the power of Jesus that brought him back around. He now uses the talents God created him with to reach others through his music. That is his form of spiritual worship.
I started thinking about my turn around and return to the Lord. My spiritual worship, my living sacrifice. Am I doing it, or am I still listening to lies?
I have to admit, I get discouraged from working 8 hours a day, in a spiritually void place. I realized I was letting Satan plant weeds around the truth about the plans God has for me.
I confessed them immediately to God; and realized the truth of God will happen. Let that joy fill my heart to overflow.
On the drive home, I was reflecting on my choice to let my belief in God's promises radiate out from me, letting that joy continue to shine on my face, when I saw it--the rainbow: God's promise in Genesis 9:12-14.
The rainbow is a symbol of God's covenant, His promise.
Now I don't know If you've ever driven through a rainbow, but I have to tell you, it was an Awesome experience.
To reflect on God's promises, to purpose in my heart to believe them, and just at that moment to come around the corner, no other car nearby, to see that rainbow and realize I could drive through it, and did it...definately a God moment.
26 May, 2010
Preparation
This may not seem like it's on the same track, but catch the train anyway.
I was reminded of a story today "....awful, no good, very bad day." That was today. Nothing went right. Issues at work. Issues at home. Grandmother had a mini stroke.
I was down low today. Ant-level low. So I went to church. They have a great dinner on Wed. Nights. I actually had pistachio ice cream for dessert, and found that I like it.
Preparation
The Pastor was preaching out of Revelation
Revelation 19:7
7 Let us be glad, rejoice, and give Him glory,
because the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and His wife has prepared herself.
My eyes kept going back to that last sentence.
What did she do? Say it with me class...she prepared herself.
Uh oh, I thought. I haven't really done much preparation for Jesus' return. I'm not using the talents He gave me to the fullest.
Think about a bride on her wedding day. She doesn't jump out of bed, throw her dress over her head, and go the church.
No! She takes time to prepare herself.
Being a good writer takes preparation. Preparation requires lots of practice.
I had reached a point today, where I was at the end of my rope. So I grabbed a stool, clipboard, and some journal paper and sat outside.
Off the top of my head, I jotted down one line. "This is the last diary entry for Henrietta Blacksmith."
I then went on to write a cliffhanger of an opening.
I read it back to myself and got excited. It's good.
I'm not going to add to it right now. I'm going to leave it in it's,top of the roller coaster, cliffhanger status as I have a young adult novel to finish and another one after that. Then I'll have time for Henry-girl.
Preparation
A successful writer has to be able to write no matter the circumstance. If this is to be my way of life then I need practice on how to keep writing through trials and difficulties.
Today showed me: yes I can write while under enormous stress, and turn out good work.
Preparation to be a writer, while learning to trust and obey God. Good preparation.
I was reminded of a story today "....awful, no good, very bad day." That was today. Nothing went right. Issues at work. Issues at home. Grandmother had a mini stroke.
I was down low today. Ant-level low. So I went to church. They have a great dinner on Wed. Nights. I actually had pistachio ice cream for dessert, and found that I like it.
Preparation
The Pastor was preaching out of Revelation
Revelation 19:7
7 Let us be glad, rejoice, and give Him glory,
because the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and His wife has prepared herself.
My eyes kept going back to that last sentence.
What did she do? Say it with me class...she prepared herself.
Uh oh, I thought. I haven't really done much preparation for Jesus' return. I'm not using the talents He gave me to the fullest.
Think about a bride on her wedding day. She doesn't jump out of bed, throw her dress over her head, and go the church.
No! She takes time to prepare herself.
Being a good writer takes preparation. Preparation requires lots of practice.
I had reached a point today, where I was at the end of my rope. So I grabbed a stool, clipboard, and some journal paper and sat outside.
Off the top of my head, I jotted down one line. "This is the last diary entry for Henrietta Blacksmith."
I then went on to write a cliffhanger of an opening.
I read it back to myself and got excited. It's good.
I'm not going to add to it right now. I'm going to leave it in it's,top of the roller coaster, cliffhanger status as I have a young adult novel to finish and another one after that. Then I'll have time for Henry-girl.
Preparation
A successful writer has to be able to write no matter the circumstance. If this is to be my way of life then I need practice on how to keep writing through trials and difficulties.
Today showed me: yes I can write while under enormous stress, and turn out good work.
Preparation to be a writer, while learning to trust and obey God. Good preparation.
23 May, 2010
Blessings and Perception
During my quiet time one day a thought popped into my head: would you like to be able to do a writer's retreat, even if it was only for three days away in a hotel?
I said yeah I'd love to, but I have to fill my summer with paying teacher workshops.
I've been putting off doing my summer budget because I knew I didn't have enough to make it through. But I prayed and put everything in God's hands and began jotting down what my bills would be for the next three months. Because although summer break is only two months, the school year starts so late I actually need to cover an extra month.
So I listed everything. Cringed at the figure listed, and then listed my income through the end of this school year, plus my savings.
God moment.
I don't have to work this summer.
Not only that...
I can do a writing retreat while my daughter is at church summer camp.
Obedience is blessed by God. I know God really wants me to focus on getting this Young Adult novel completed. It's a Christian fantasy book (think CS Lewis or JRR Tolkein).
Having the summer off I have no excuse not to write at least 6hours a day.
So what does that have to do with perception?
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with your whole heart and lean not on your own understanding...
I made a choice about two weeks ago to obey God's call for me to live a life apart, to obey Him even when I don't understand.
Part of that is witnessing more and sharing His love with lost people.
Unfortunately, when you spend time ministering to the world, there are those Christians who think you've gone back to the world; look at you as if you are a backslider.
It pains my heart but I know I'm in God's will in what I'm doing and those that truly know me and love me will not mistake the glow on my face as coming from anywhere but Christ.
I wish more Christians had a heart for the world.
Perception: God does not bless disobedience. A summer off so I can write is a blessing for my repentance and obedience.
Now I wonder what will happen to my reputation when I start hanging out with prostitutes on Nebraska Ave sharing coffee and Gospels of John with them?
I said yeah I'd love to, but I have to fill my summer with paying teacher workshops.
I've been putting off doing my summer budget because I knew I didn't have enough to make it through. But I prayed and put everything in God's hands and began jotting down what my bills would be for the next three months. Because although summer break is only two months, the school year starts so late I actually need to cover an extra month.
So I listed everything. Cringed at the figure listed, and then listed my income through the end of this school year, plus my savings.
God moment.
I don't have to work this summer.
Not only that...
I can do a writing retreat while my daughter is at church summer camp.
Obedience is blessed by God. I know God really wants me to focus on getting this Young Adult novel completed. It's a Christian fantasy book (think CS Lewis or JRR Tolkein).
Having the summer off I have no excuse not to write at least 6hours a day.
So what does that have to do with perception?
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with your whole heart and lean not on your own understanding...
I made a choice about two weeks ago to obey God's call for me to live a life apart, to obey Him even when I don't understand.
Part of that is witnessing more and sharing His love with lost people.
Unfortunately, when you spend time ministering to the world, there are those Christians who think you've gone back to the world; look at you as if you are a backslider.
It pains my heart but I know I'm in God's will in what I'm doing and those that truly know me and love me will not mistake the glow on my face as coming from anywhere but Christ.
I wish more Christians had a heart for the world.
Perception: God does not bless disobedience. A summer off so I can write is a blessing for my repentance and obedience.
Now I wonder what will happen to my reputation when I start hanging out with prostitutes on Nebraska Ave sharing coffee and Gospels of John with them?
22 May, 2010
Disappointment
I've never been really good at handling disappointment. Which isn't good if you want to be a writer. You can't win every contest, or even place in the top ten all the time.
The past two writing contests I've entered I didn't win.
On the positive side the feedback from the 48 hour screenwriting contest shows I improved dramatically in the areas I was weak in the first time I submitted a screenplay.
At first I was so disappointed I didn't make it to round two. But then I reminded myself that I should read the judge's feedback and see if I agree or not...I did.
The feedback actually encouraged me. "solid scenes, well drawn characters, crisp dialogue."
Huge improvement over "flat characters, weak protagonist".
Even though I didn't make it to the second round I feel my writing has grown and that's the direction I need to be headed in.
The past two writing contests I've entered I didn't win.
On the positive side the feedback from the 48 hour screenwriting contest shows I improved dramatically in the areas I was weak in the first time I submitted a screenplay.
At first I was so disappointed I didn't make it to round two. But then I reminded myself that I should read the judge's feedback and see if I agree or not...I did.
The feedback actually encouraged me. "solid scenes, well drawn characters, crisp dialogue."
Huge improvement over "flat characters, weak protagonist".
Even though I didn't make it to the second round I feel my writing has grown and that's the direction I need to be headed in.
Disappointment
I've never been really good at handling disappointment. Which isn't good if you want to be a writer. You can't win every contest, or even place in the top ten all the time.
The past two writing contests I've entered I didn't win.
On the positive side the feedback from the 48 hour screenwriting contest shows I improved dramatically in the areas I was weak in the first time I submitted a screenplay.
At first I was so disappointed I didn't make it to round two. But then I reminded myself that I should read the judge's feedback and see if I agree or not...I did.
The feedback actually encouraged me. "solid scenes, well drawn characters, crisp dialogue."
Huge improvement over "flat characters, weak protagonist".
Even though I didn't make it to the second round I feel my writing has grown and that's the direction I need to be headed in.
The past two writing contests I've entered I didn't win.
On the positive side the feedback from the 48 hour screenwriting contest shows I improved dramatically in the areas I was weak in the first time I submitted a screenplay.
At first I was so disappointed I didn't make it to round two. But then I reminded myself that I should read the judge's feedback and see if I agree or not...I did.
The feedback actually encouraged me. "solid scenes, well drawn characters, crisp dialogue."
Huge improvement over "flat characters, weak protagonist".
Even though I didn't make it to the second round I feel my writing has grown and that's the direction I need to be headed in.
19 May, 2010
Running
I went to a paved trail with the intent and purpose of walking 3 miles. Now God had already told me He wants me back running (jogging). So I started my walk. As I walked my mind and spirit were restless. I could not figure out why. So I prayed to Jesus. “What is wrong?” Yeah, you can already see the answer can’t you. “You're supposed to be running.” Is what He said.
So I said “Ok Lord. I’ll run the last ¼ mile back.” Then I stopped myself, literally in my tracks. “No” I told myself. I’m not supposed to be bargaining with God. I am supposed to say an obedient Yes and do whatever He asks of me. So I ran the last 1.5 miles back.
I wish I could say it was easy. It wasn’t. I am out of shape. (I haven’t seriously run in 5 years.) I had to stop a few times. Each time I stopped. Jesus would press me forward. “Ok Desiree, go to that tree and then rest. Go to that shade area and then rest.” I kept praying as I ran. The sweat running down my face, into my eyes. At the next rest stop I told Jesus I didn’t want to stop. I wanted to finish and please help me to not stop. He did. I ran the last ¼ mile without stopping. I cranked up Toby Mac on the iPod part of my iPhone and looked at my feet as I ran. Jesus said: “Don’t look ahead, that’s the future. Look at the here and now and focus on what needs to be done now.”
You should have seen the smile on my face when Jesus said “Look up. You’re done.” You know without Jesus, it’s difficult and you want to just quit for good. With Jesus, it’s actually possible.
So I said “Ok Lord. I’ll run the last ¼ mile back.” Then I stopped myself, literally in my tracks. “No” I told myself. I’m not supposed to be bargaining with God. I am supposed to say an obedient Yes and do whatever He asks of me. So I ran the last 1.5 miles back.
I wish I could say it was easy. It wasn’t. I am out of shape. (I haven’t seriously run in 5 years.) I had to stop a few times. Each time I stopped. Jesus would press me forward. “Ok Desiree, go to that tree and then rest. Go to that shade area and then rest.” I kept praying as I ran. The sweat running down my face, into my eyes. At the next rest stop I told Jesus I didn’t want to stop. I wanted to finish and please help me to not stop. He did. I ran the last ¼ mile without stopping. I cranked up Toby Mac on the iPod part of my iPhone and looked at my feet as I ran. Jesus said: “Don’t look ahead, that’s the future. Look at the here and now and focus on what needs to be done now.”
You should have seen the smile on my face when Jesus said “Look up. You’re done.” You know without Jesus, it’s difficult and you want to just quit for good. With Jesus, it’s actually possible.
Goals
Goals
I had a great meeting with my Pastor on Monday. He reminded me about the importance of setting goals. I’ve never prayerfully set goals before. Today (Monday), I had my quiet time and used it to set goals. I started with listening to praise music and reading my bible.
As I began, I felt the Holy Spirit impressing upon me to set not only a writing goal, but a spiritual goal. So I wrote my goals as a request to God.
“What is my spiritual goal this year?” And guess what? God answered. Then I asked “What is my writing goal this year?” and again God answered. God did not want me to put down a 5 or 10 year goal.
I finished writing other questions and God’s responses to them. When I looked at what I had written I knew I had had an encounter with the Living God.
I had a great meeting with my Pastor on Monday. He reminded me about the importance of setting goals. I’ve never prayerfully set goals before. Today (Monday), I had my quiet time and used it to set goals. I started with listening to praise music and reading my bible.
As I began, I felt the Holy Spirit impressing upon me to set not only a writing goal, but a spiritual goal. So I wrote my goals as a request to God.
“What is my spiritual goal this year?” And guess what? God answered. Then I asked “What is my writing goal this year?” and again God answered. God did not want me to put down a 5 or 10 year goal.
I finished writing other questions and God’s responses to them. When I looked at what I had written I knew I had had an encounter with the Living God.
13 May, 2010
Birthday Countdown
6 days until my birthday. Time for some reflection. I can definitely say I am not the same person I was last year or any year prior.
It feels weird in a good way, this freedom in Christ.
I am in no way perfect and I do still make mistakes, but praying and reading my bible reminds me to stay God focused, not circumstances focused.
I have so many questions.
The women's book I'm writing... I want it to be done right. The goal is that the focus is not on me and any "elegant" words I may use, but on turning these women's eyes and hearts to Jesus, letting Him in to clean house.
So as the Apostle Paul said in Philippians 3:13 I am forgetting was was behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead...
Yeah I'm excited to see God's plan for me arrive at that appointed time.
This year really is Happy Birthday!
It feels weird in a good way, this freedom in Christ.
I am in no way perfect and I do still make mistakes, but praying and reading my bible reminds me to stay God focused, not circumstances focused.
I have so many questions.
The women's book I'm writing... I want it to be done right. The goal is that the focus is not on me and any "elegant" words I may use, but on turning these women's eyes and hearts to Jesus, letting Him in to clean house.
So as the Apostle Paul said in Philippians 3:13 I am forgetting was was behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead...
Yeah I'm excited to see God's plan for me arrive at that appointed time.
This year really is Happy Birthday!
10 May, 2010
The Vision
Habakkuk 2:3 “The vision is yet for the appointed TIME. It testifies about the end and does not LIE. Though it tarries, wait for it, for it WILL surely come and not be LATE.
Sunday I stood in front of my bible fellowship class (Sunday School), and explained why I got re-baptized the past Wednesday. In a nutshell when you run from God, He doesn’t run from you. I’m now embracing the life My Lord wants for me and that’s the reason for the verse from Habakkuk. He’s one of the Minor Prophets in the Old Testament. I’m not sure how a prophet can be minor, but it’s a short book in the bible. It’s been almost three years since God gave me a vision. In my fear I ran from it, but even Moses would agree: You can’t escape who you are created to be.
In these three years, I have come to know more about me, about my Savior Jesus, and about the world around me. I’ve come to understand what refining fire is, and I’ve come to understand that I do nothing in this life with my own strength, but through Christ who lives in me.
All that is within me says the TIME is now. Time for more focus on my writing. Time to prepare my heart. Time for God’s vision. Does that mean it will happen tomorrow? I don’t know. What I do know is that God’s train is pulling into the station again, and this time instead of running away, I’m running to hop on board.
Sunday I stood in front of my bible fellowship class (Sunday School), and explained why I got re-baptized the past Wednesday. In a nutshell when you run from God, He doesn’t run from you. I’m now embracing the life My Lord wants for me and that’s the reason for the verse from Habakkuk. He’s one of the Minor Prophets in the Old Testament. I’m not sure how a prophet can be minor, but it’s a short book in the bible. It’s been almost three years since God gave me a vision. In my fear I ran from it, but even Moses would agree: You can’t escape who you are created to be.
In these three years, I have come to know more about me, about my Savior Jesus, and about the world around me. I’ve come to understand what refining fire is, and I’ve come to understand that I do nothing in this life with my own strength, but through Christ who lives in me.
All that is within me says the TIME is now. Time for more focus on my writing. Time to prepare my heart. Time for God’s vision. Does that mean it will happen tomorrow? I don’t know. What I do know is that God’s train is pulling into the station again, and this time instead of running away, I’m running to hop on board.
08 May, 2010
Jahovah Jireh (God provides)
God provides
Genesis 22 tells the story of Abraham and Isaac and how Abraham demonstrated his trust in God.
God promises. God provides.
I have a clear direction from God as to what He wants me to write next.
It will be painful to write. It will shed light on some old wounds that need to be healed.
Ultimately God wants to use it to bring healing to other women.
Tonight I'll be looking back over the outline, refining it through prayer.
A life set apart is what God has asked of me. With His strength I'm ready.
Genesis 22 tells the story of Abraham and Isaac and how Abraham demonstrated his trust in God.
God promises. God provides.
I have a clear direction from God as to what He wants me to write next.
It will be painful to write. It will shed light on some old wounds that need to be healed.
Ultimately God wants to use it to bring healing to other women.
Tonight I'll be looking back over the outline, refining it through prayer.
A life set apart is what God has asked of me. With His strength I'm ready.
04 May, 2010
Let the countdown begin
No, I don't mean to the end of the school year. I mean the countdown to... Wait? Yes I do. Sorry being random again.
Looking forward to a summer of writing.
In 12 days I find out if I made it to round two of the screenwriting competition I entered last month.
It was 48 hours to write one scene. I think I wrote a solid, passionate scene, with living, breathing characters.
Emailing the first three pages of a hard core science fiction story to a best selling author to see if it gets me into his workshop.
Still reading as much as I can. Bible takes precedence.
Did get some revision writing done tonight as well as squeezed in time for exercise.
What is important we make time for.
Looking forward to a summer of writing.
In 12 days I find out if I made it to round two of the screenwriting competition I entered last month.
It was 48 hours to write one scene. I think I wrote a solid, passionate scene, with living, breathing characters.
Emailing the first three pages of a hard core science fiction story to a best selling author to see if it gets me into his workshop.
Still reading as much as I can. Bible takes precedence.
Did get some revision writing done tonight as well as squeezed in time for exercise.
What is important we make time for.
03 May, 2010
Getting ready
Pausing during a five mile walk. Thank you Mary Carmen.
It helps to sweat while listening to praise music and praying. I feel sweaty yes, but I also feel
Yeah, what do I feel?
Saw an abandoned truck area that gave me an idea for a sci fi short story.
Thoughts about the dream I keep having about my living in a Spanish speaking country. Being outdoors helps me to think about my repeat dream and helps relax me from a stressful day in the classroom, so I can go home and write.
It helps to sweat while listening to praise music and praying. I feel sweaty yes, but I also feel
Yeah, what do I feel?
Saw an abandoned truck area that gave me an idea for a sci fi short story.
Thoughts about the dream I keep having about my living in a Spanish speaking country. Being outdoors helps me to think about my repeat dream and helps relax me from a stressful day in the classroom, so I can go home and write.
02 May, 2010
Renewal
Renewal
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind so you may know what is that good, perfect, and pleasing will of God. Romans chapter 12 verse 2.
Words to live by? Yes. Words to commit my writing to? Definitely.
Today I re-dedicated my life to Jesus Christ.
I'm reading a book about knowing God's will.
I'm also reading some hard core science fiction to prime the pump so to speak.
There are two types of writing I'm most passionate about: science fiction , and Christian non-fiction.
What I feel God drawing me towards is to write science fiction and fantasy from a Christian perspective. It fits my life like pieces in a jigsaw puzzle.
I also have to look over the first ten pages of a manuscript I am preparing to submit to a science fiction writing workshop. It will either be my ticket in, or I'll get a thanks but no thanks reply.
Either response is independent of my being obedient to God.
Mine is to obey. His is to open doors.
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind so you may know what is that good, perfect, and pleasing will of God. Romans chapter 12 verse 2.
Words to live by? Yes. Words to commit my writing to? Definitely.
Today I re-dedicated my life to Jesus Christ.
I'm reading a book about knowing God's will.
I'm also reading some hard core science fiction to prime the pump so to speak.
There are two types of writing I'm most passionate about: science fiction , and Christian non-fiction.
What I feel God drawing me towards is to write science fiction and fantasy from a Christian perspective. It fits my life like pieces in a jigsaw puzzle.
I also have to look over the first ten pages of a manuscript I am preparing to submit to a science fiction writing workshop. It will either be my ticket in, or I'll get a thanks but no thanks reply.
Either response is independent of my being obedient to God.
Mine is to obey. His is to open doors.
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