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06 February, 2011

I found her voice/my voice

Last night was rough. Bad dream woke me up at 1 am. Memories from the past. I took that dream and Ephesians 6 (armor of God), and put it to good use.

God spoke something to me a week ago and I couldn't understand what He was saying to me until last night/this morning.
He said I've forgotten my first love. Yes that is a verse out of the book of Revelation, but that's not the context He was using it in.

What was my first love? Books. What kind of books Des? Anne McCaffrey Dragon Riders of Pern, that I read in elementary school. My first love was adult fantasy books.
And for you legalistic Christian-modern day Pharisees: Revelation 2:4-God is my true love. He used this verse to remind me in my writing what was my first love, that I had abandoned,and that I can use my first love and my true love harmoniously together.

I was the kid who got in trouble at school for daydreaming; for after reading a novel, or even some of my own writing I would stay in that world, as oppose to the one around me.

It's like the light bulb came on. There is a reason I am and have been such a daydreamer. I can literally live in my character's world. So I rewrote the opening of my novel. And yes it has changed considerably. She's older, and has already suffered a great loss and more is to come before she can be the person she was created to be. As she is on that journey to who she is meant to be, so many of us will be able to take courage from her and make our own choices. That is my hope-what comes across to the reader.

For the first time I feel my character. I'm not just writing about her like some casual, uninvolved observer, I am in her world, stalking her. I feel her. She hurts I hurt. She rejoices I rejoice.

Cool huh? Well that's all I have time for today. Ive been writing for three hours. Now I'm taking a short break to eat and let her world firmly mesh into mine. Daydream time.


  1. Yay! I'm glad you were able to figure out your dreams--even if it did start as a nightmare. Now if only I could remember mine. :)

  2. I realized my quirkiness is my talent and to just go with it, not try to make myself fit into someone's idea of an author.